October 2009
2 posts
3 tags
“There’s just something really nice about drinking out of glasses....”
– Overheard on the University TTC line
4 tags
Someone explain this to us:
Teenage girl #1: I was drunk the first time we made out. Teenage girl #2: Like made out in general? Teenage girl #1: Yeah, in general.
- Overheard at Yonge & Bloor
September 2009
5 posts
4 tags
“Does anyone have a gun? I will give some asshole a thousand dollars for a gun so...”
– Overheard on the Queen streetcar (at 3:30am)
6 tags
Oh...one of THOSE girls...
Girl: I am one of those girls who has lots of pillows on her bed. Boy: One of those girls? Girl: Yeah and when boys come over I am like ‘Get in the bed’ and they’re like ‘Where?’
- Overheard at Nirvana
2 tags
If being gay is wrong, then we don't want to be...
Girl: What the fuck is wrong with you? Guy: I’m gay. Girl: I’m sorry. It’s been a long time since I met one of you.
- Overheard at Shaw and Bloor
3 tags
“NO. Jason was the only one to get with Samantha. He got a blow job from her. He...”
– Overheard at St. Clair and Spadina
6 tags
....And world peace.
Girl #1: What do you want to do? Girl #2: I wanna wake up and feel sober
- Overheard at Nirvana
August 2009
3 posts
3 tags
Yeah. Wait, what?
Guy #1: I don’t have to get up till 3. Guy #2: Good, I can totally piss on your face.
- Overheard on College St
4 tags
and the mother issues begin
Mother to 4-year-old child: I don’t care what you say, you’re full of shit anyways.
- Overheard at Yorkdale Mall
3 tags
So you're saying the neighbourhood's sketchy?
Guy: If you’ve ever wanted to see someone shoot up heroin, you came to the right place.
- Overheard at Bloor and Landsdowne
July 2009
7 posts
3 tags
“He made my girl part all dirty. EW!”
– Overheard at Wendy’s
4 tags
Common mistake
Guy #1: That guy is Whytte! Guy #2: Whaaaat? That guy is totally black. Guy #1: No, I mean that’s his name. Whytte!
- Overheard at the Toronto FC game
4 tags
You never know with hipsters
Girl to friend: It’s not like they wanna gang bang me….do they???
-Overheard at Ronnies in Kensington
4 tags
“Why would you haunt Neverland when you could haunt a children’s ward?”
– Overheard by “Too Soon?”
3 tags
We're also an intelligent nation...
Guy #1: It’s pretty sad more people don’t play Russian roulette. Guy #2: It’s Canada. It’s hard to get a gun.
- Overheard at Major St. and Harbord
4 tags
Sober? Don't you mean drunk?
Guy to girl checking her phone: Are you waiting for a text? Girl: No I’m just waiting to feel a little more sober.
- Overheard at Labyrinth
5 tags
“You can wipe cum off your face, but you can’t remove the shame.”
– Overheard at University of Toronto
June 2009
22 posts
3 tags
“I’ve been working for a year now and it’s been hell. I can’t...”
– Overheard at Yonge & Wellesley
5 tags
one way to work your way up the corporate ladder
Girl: Ummm…where am I going? Guy: Where are you going? Girl: I’m going down.
- Overheard in the TD Trust Tower
4 tags
“Wow. That still guy has a pimp accordion.”
– Overheard at Taste of Italy on College Street
2 tags
No need for name calling
Cougar: Do you like perrier? You look dehydrated. Guy: Oh really? Well, you look inebriated.
- Overheard at the Drink Show
3 tags
“It’s not 5 or 10 dollars! It’s 3000. That’s Molotov cocktail...”
– - Overheard at Nirvana
4 tags
Toucan Sam's original slogan
Guy#1: Ummm…should I call her? Guy#2: Just follow your balls.
- Overheard at Jack Astors at Yonge&Bloor
3 tags
Pigeons are the devil
Flamboyant male hairdresser: Well a bird just shit on my head so I’m definitely winning the lottery this week.
- Overheard in a salon in Yorkville
5 tags
“I don’t think I’ve ever been here when I wasn’t hungover.”
– - Overheard at BOOM on College Street
3 tags
Have a little awareness, lady
Woman talking very loudly while chewing licorice very obnoxiously: I ride the Go every morning and there is this girl who wears these headphones and her music is so loud. I mean really, what is she like a child? Man passing by to get off at his stop: …yeah, like chewing with your mouth open?
- Overheard on the Queen streetcar
4 tags
Knowing one's limits is important
Guy #1: Excuse me, can we have two double ryes? Guy #2: No wait, I don’t need a drink? Guy #1: Really? Okay, one. Guy #2: Yeah, just bring me a single.
- Overheard at Nirvana, College and Bathurst
3 tags
Not very ladylike
Female biker to another: Pass on the LEFT motherfucker!
- Overheard at College and Dovercourt
4 tags
What's the last opera you saw?
Guy to male friend: Have you ever seen Faceoff? Friend: Yeah, it was awesome. It was like opera with guns.
- Overheard on the College streetcar
4 tags
Easy decision
20-something girl to sister: So, ice cream or no ice cream? Random female passerby: Ice cream!!!
- Overheard at College and Manning
5 tags
The Music Man would be so proud
Guy: Your cousin is TROUBLE. Girl: With a capital T and that rhymes with P and that stands for…poon…?
- Overheard at Shaw and Harbord
4 tags
After-school special in the making
Father with his son wearing a helmet on a skateboard. 30-year-old male on skateboard being towed uphill by 20-something on bike: Son, this is not the way to ride a skateboard. Father: Don’t worry, we are taking notes.
- Overheard on Shaw street
4 tags
We can only dream of what they'd do to hipsters
Guy: Is there an American Apparel in Saudi Arabia? Friend: No way! They would bomb that shit.
- Overheard at Ronnie’s in Kensington
4 tags
It's a cruel cruel world
Restaurant host: Would you like to see a menu? Passerby: No. Restaurant host: Well, that was harsh.
- Overheard near Front St.
4 tags
So pour me another glass
Girl to friends: You don’t get drunk off wine. You just get angry and belligerent.
- Overheard on Shaw St.
4 tags
“I’m not sure how you trim your chest hair, but it makes you look like you...”
– - Overheard at Bloor and Major St.
4 tags
But then you'd have fake tan on your fist
Guy to girlfriend: Man, wouldn’t it be awesome to punch Ben Mulroney in the face.
- Overheard at the Monk debates @ the ROM
3 tags
3 tags
Never try and fake it with a woman
“I tried to fake it and she called me on that shit. ‘I can see the condom’. Three condoms later and ……… Nothing.”
- Overheard in Kensington
May 2009
14 posts
3 tags
Prom, the happiest night of the year!
“Yo guy, I’m gonna fuck every chick in that hotel.”
- Overheard on the front steps of Shaw St. high school
5 tags
“So I’ve never understood anime porn.”
– - Overheard at Bloor and Brunswick Ave.
1 tag
No one can be polite, anymore?
Girl to friend: What’s with all these brown guys trying to be my friend?
- Overheard on Shaw St.
3 tags
Definitely a keeper, Dude
“So I presented my balls to her face and she was like, ‘Mmmm, I love balls.’”
- Overheard at Manning and College St.
2 tags
She has a point
Man: Do you have the time? 20-something girl: Yeah, it’s 6:25. Man: Are you sure? Girl shows him her watch. Man: Are you sure? Girl: That’s what my watch says. Man: Well it was 6:20 ten minutes ago, so it can’t be 6:25. Girl: Well you seem to know the time, so why the hell are you asking me?!
-Overheard at Jane subway station
3 tags
Is there a secret hatch? Or just use the window..
Driver: For the next dozen or so stops, please escape out the back.
- Overheard on the College streetcar
5 tags
Preachin' to the choir, kid.
6-year-old girl: Kindergarten is strange b/c you don’t get that much work. And then when I got to grade 1, there was WORK!
- Overheard on the College Streetcar
deathbyrubies vs. waitingforgodot
dbr: So I'm walking home.. and I totally had an epitome
w4g: did you just say epitome?
dbr: yeah an epitome! she should have done that instead... oh my god. EPIPHANY!!!!
w4g: and circle get's the square
4 tags
Don't hold back or anything
Girl #1: Did you hear Sarah is getting a nose job? Girl #2: She did. I’ve seen it. It’s all pointy and gross. Girl #1: Meh. Sucks to be her.
Overheard on the TTC
5 tags
As do all our other quality imports
“It’s Rogers. It’s shit television. All my reality TV comes from the United States.”
Overheard on University Ave.
3 tags
Maybe you just need new friends
Hipster: She’s so socially inappropriate and all over the place. Friend: That’s how you describe everyone.
Overheard on College St.